Change prostitution definition

Opinion

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This article was published 25/01/2016 (3542 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I usually agree with your advice, but I do have to quibble about the young man who is servicing two older ladies in exchange for money for university tuition and his living expenses. He is not doing anything illegal, against the law or prohibited. The laws were struck down. Current laws on prostitution in Canada make legal to sell sexual services, but what is illegal, unfortunately for his clientele, is purchasing sexual services. That may explain why a successful Canadian gigolo gave a definition of the service he provides: a luxury companion for ladies.

Our young man just needs to provide his clients with a little more than his sexual services so that “companionship” is an accurate description of their relationship. I personally see nothing wrong with what he’s doing: he is earning much-needed money while not compromising his study time, and the ladies are getting their much-needed companionship.

— Liberal-Minded Lady, Winnipeg

Dear Liberal-Minded Lady: Let’s say I was riding on an airplane with someone from a country with truly liberal laws concerning prostitution, and that person asked me if prostitution was legal in Canada. I would have to say, “Not exactly.” In Canada right now, the laws you are talking about are designed to catch and punish the buyers of sex. That in turn limits the business of the sex providers.

Had this man’s Lady Friend No. 1 not gotten drunk and bragged to her friends about this fellow, there probably wouldn’t be a problem. But now, her circle of friends is talking about it. Since this young man hopes to be entering the medical profession, he doesn’t need a gigolo reputation following him around.

Not that he’s blameless. He actively cruised bars and chatted up the first lady, who took him on as a paid sex provider and friend. Does that make him a gigolo? One lady? Later, she suggested him to a friend of hers. Since she suggested Lady No. 2 in his grand string of two, does that make her a Madame? And, she got no cut of that business from him — it was a favour to her friend, and to him. If prostitution were legal, there would be no need for these three people to stop their paid arrangement or pretend it’s something it isn’t. No one would be vulnerable.

In jolly old England, and other countries in Europe, well-to-do men who took mistresses used to give them a “parting gift” of thousands of pounds, plus the house already bought for her to live in — and then they would move on to the next mistress. That’s not likely to happen with these two Canadian ladies.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I like what you told the mom who was essentially being emotionally blackmailed into looking after her son’s pets while he went on holiday. There is another option. There are people out there who pet-sit. I have a friend who makes a tidy bit of extra money doing that (I’m not trying to solicit business for her, just in case it sounds that way). She will go in and feed pets in the home, give them fresh water and clean the litter boxes. I believe she walks dogs, too.

I’m sure my friend is not unique. If the son is lucky enough to have a conscientious friend, that’s great, but just in case he doesn’t, I thought I ought to mention this. I have never written to you before, but I always enjoy reading your column and sometimes there have been items I have found helpful in my life. Cheers.

— R., Winnipeg

Dear R.: Thanks for the pet-sitting suggestions. There are good pet sitters who provide food, water, exercise and affection, and there are work-to-rule types and the odd neglectful one who doesn’t feed the pets when the animals are used to eating.

How’s the pet owner to know? After all, the pets can’t speak English to complain when the owners get home. How do you check out pet sitters beforehand and during the process? Maybe his mom could do that much and it’s far less than her son was asking. A check on people who might otherwise be lax is a good idea, and it would keep her conscience clear.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave,. Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts
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