Husband turning into a fat boozer

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This article was published 29/01/2016 (3872 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My husband is a winner to the outside world, but has become a loser in his private life. When he comes home, he takes off his $1,000 suits, meticulously hangs them up, puts on a pair of shorts (even in the winter), raggedy-ass sweatshirts and stupid flip flops then cracks a beer and drinks all night — he’s growing the beer gut to prove it.

I know he plays the role at work and is Mr. Up and Coming, climbing the corporate ladder. But for me, he’s no longer the young ambitious guy I loved, full of ideas, plans and sexual attraction. Sex doesn’t happen much as he drinks himself into a stupor and passes out in a chair by 10 p.m. Help!

— Scared, Married Five Years, Winnipeg

Dear Scared: Talk to him before he has his first beer, and tell him you’ve noticed his growing love affair with beer. Don’t whine or cry. Describe how he changes from one person to another when he gets home. Then ask him if he feels like he’s under pressure at work, what worries him, if certain bosses make him uptight and if he has rivals or people undermining him at he office.

Also warn him he’s going to destroy everything he’s worked so hard to get at work if his alcoholism grows, and he’s going to destroy his marriage to you as well. After he calms down, suggest you both go to the gym in the evenings to get rid of some of the weight, and brainstorm ways to help him make work enjoyable again. Let him know you care more about him and his health than his status. Please write back and let me know how stage one goes, then we’ll talk stage two.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: Please let people know that if they start bathing their cats at a young age it removes the dander, which is what people are allergic to. My partner is allergic to cats, but I’ve always bathed my kitties. They love joining me in the tub for my soaks. One of them loved the water so much he demanded to be in the shower with me. Dogs are notorious for getting dirty, and because they’re bathed more frequently, I think that’s why they don’t bother people like cats do.

— Water-Lovin’ Cat Mom, Winnipeg

Dear Cat Mom: I guess you start them out young to get them used to it. I tried this with my huge long-haired Norwegian forest cat and he gave me the bath instead. Now I have no dander, and I got soaking wet.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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