Potential bridezilla needs to simmer down

Opinion

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 27/12/2016 (3213 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I hear through my spy system that I’m getting engaged on New Year’s Eve. The problem is my boyfriend has always wanted to get married in the spring (April) and I have always wanted to get married in mid-June when it’s guaranteed to be warm and the flowers are out. We have argued over this before and I have been accused of being stubborn and always wanting my own way. It’s true. Who else’s way would I want? I’m the bride and I want the wedding when we can have pictures outside. Don’t I get say in the matter? — Already Annoyed Bride, St. James

Dear Already Annoyed Bride: You’re not a bride yet, and he could change his mind. If it’s a long-term happy marriage you want — not just a wedding — show you can compromise. You’re going to be a bridezilla and he knows that, yet, at this point, he’s still up for marrying you. If you get engaged now, you have six months of wedding-related conversation ahead which bores and annoys most men to death.

Why not get married in mid-May? That’s a small concession: the weather should be lovely and mild by then. Don’t push your luck on this engagement.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I hate to be tickled! It’s torture and makes me want to throw up, but my boyfriend tickled me anyway at a recent party. I was soon screaming and feeling sick and yelled for him to stop. He kept on and on and all I could think of doing was biting, so I chomped into his arm. It was a bad bite and he has a big purple and red bruise he’s not covering up. He announces to people, “She bit me!” Now people are looking at me like I have a problem.

Isn’t tickling someone to the point they get sick an act of violence? I think the biting worked, though. I can guarantee you he won’t tickle me again. Now he’s… — Once Bitten, Twice Shy, Winnipeg

Dear Once Bitten, Twice Shy: Tickling you when he knew how you would react was nasty and violent. So was taking a big bite out of his arm. Together you two form a folie à deux, a pairing where two people bring out the worst in each other. You both need to find a different kind of partner.

It’s not unreasonable to predict more violence ahead. He’s furious at you, or he wouldn’t be wearing short-sleeved shirts and loudly broadcasting the incident. Also, he may feel he owes you a wallop the next time there’s a fight and believes people would back him if he did let you have it.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: Last year I made a New Year’s resolution to quit my job and start my own business. I was terrified, but I had a big savings account built up and I took the chance. I broke even this year and am set to do well in 2017 now that my major start-up expenses are behind me. People say you should be doing at midnight on New Year’s Eve whatever it is you wish to be doing more of the next year, so last year at midnight I took a cab to the place I wanted to rent office space and asked the driver to wait. I went out and took pictures of the windows where I wanted my business to be. Then I went home to dream of my successful new business. It worked! I highly recommend this to people who have a big dream for the next year. — New Year’s Eve Magic, Winnipeg

Dear New Year’s Eve Magic: A good business idea, determination, hard work and a little luck carried you through the first year of your new business — and that little ritual was a smart bit of psychological magic you created yourself! You visualized your success, captured it with your camera and made it real in your mind. Best of luck to everyone with dreams this New Year’s Eve!

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

   Read full biography