Moving back with mom going to mess up love life

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 18/03/2018 (3079 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: To save money, I just started living in the basement of my parents’ house again and brought home my first girl. I really liked her and she was shy to come downstairs with my folks upstairs. We tried not to make any sexual noises.

In the morning, my mother came thundering downstairs to feed the rabbits in the rec room and must have noticed my girl’s boots on the back landing. My mom cleared her throat loudly about three times, which is a sign she wants to talk to me. I didn’t respond.

When my parents finally went to church, I got my girlfriend out and home to her house. When my parents came home, my mother said, “Don’t think you’re turning this house into a hotel where you can bring over a bunch of girls.” Then the fight began!

Should I move back out? I’m welcome to move back in my with my two friends because they need the money, but it was a bit crowded and noisy over there with the partying and chicks. — Should I Stay Or Should I Go? Riverview

Dear Should I Stay or Should I Go?: Move back out ASAP and get yourself a small apartment. It’s better to have a happy little bachelor pad where you can have privacy and be an adult with no parents around. It’s also better than trying to bring a girlfriend home when there are already two other guys having parties and women over. Moving back home with mom was a money-saver perhaps, but clearly a big mistake.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m excited about going on a trip to the Caribbean with my girlfriend, but last night I had a few drinks with my old hockey buddies, which turned out to be a bad idea. My girlfriend used to go out with one of them for years, but I didn’t steal her from him. He said, after a few drinks, that she was a pain in the butt to travel with and always wanted to be busy, busy, busy. I asked what he meant, but he didn’t tell me — just said I would find out. Now, I’m kind of worried.

Does this mean she’s going to want to do everything there is for tours and shopping, and there’s never any time for sex or R&R? We’re going in April, but his comments are making me nervous now. Why did he say that? It came off as a friendly warning, but I’m wondering if there’s more to it. We both have Type A personalities. What do you think? — Worried Now, Westwood

Dear Worried Now: This guy sounds jealous. I’m guessing the Type A lady will want to have a lot of fun and sex and go dancing when she’s down there. Maybe he’s trying to make you anxious, thinking she’ll want to go shopping all the time and drag you off on bus tours. Remember, you and she are a different combination, and when you add different things together you get different outcomes.

Stay away from this suspicious-sounding guy, who may not want her anymore but doesn’t want you to be happy with her, either. If he can get you nervous before you even get there, so much the better for him. Don’t let him take the fun anticipation away from your trip.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My man-friend is 63 and I’m 69. We get along great, but our kids and grandkids don’t like to see us holding hands. Sometimes, he pulls me on his knee and we sit there for a bit. The young adults hate it, but I don’t know what to say to them. Who are they to be so stuffy and conservative when they’re not? What should we say to them? We’re a new couple this year and we don’t want to be standoffish to each other to please this lot!

— Grandma’s Got a New Beau, St. Boniface

Dear Grandma’s Got a New Beau: When the younger people tease you about being affectionate, get on them about not being affectionate and see where that conversation goes. You could say something such as: “In my day, when people really liked each other, they showed it with affection. Why don’t you? Is there something wrong? The world could do with a little more love and affectionate touch.”

When they see you winding up to lecture them, they’ll shrug and back off.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

   Read full biography