Enjoy some fun in sun, then dump the boyfriend

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This article was published 09/03/2017 (3169 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I promised my boyfriend I’d go on holiday with him, and we have tickets for Mexico later this month, but now I’m getting sick of him! We’re going with this really nice other couple and I can’t let them down. I just don’t want to be with my guy 24/7 while I’m there, but I feel honour-bound to go or it will wreck things for the other couple.

All he wants to do is hang out by the ocean and do nothing but drink and suntan, then go back to the hotel room for fun times. How can I get through seven days away with him when I’m cooling off on him? I don’t want sex three times a day with him, which he seems to think is the way things should go on vacation. — Growing Colder, South Winnipeg

Dear Growing Colder: Since you’ve been falling out of love with him, fall in love with day trips to local sites of interest, scuba diving, excursions and jaunts to nearby towns. Get happy and active on holiday outside the hotel room. If your boyfriend wants to stay back with the other guy on the beach to swim, relax and hang out drinking beers, great! You and your female friend can go off and do things together, or you just go alone, as you won’t feel alone for long. People on tours are friendly and yappy.

Plan to be back and go for dinners with your foursome and other people you might invite that you meet along the way.

Know ahead of time where the best entertainment and dance clubs are, and get everybody out having fun after dinner. Don’t hang at the hotel, close to your room all evening, sulking and drinking pina coladas. That’s when annoying people become more annoying, and you want this trip to go smoothly and quickly. Seven days can fly by or crawl by if you don’t do much. When you get home, it’s time to break up if that’s what you need to do.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My mother won’t let me go out with the boy I want, nor with anybody for that matter, until my 16th birthday. I’m 14 now. There is this special boy in our group, and he likes me back. We’ve kissed a few times, but he told me yesterday he can’t wait two whole years to go out with me and he wants to start dating me or someone else, if I can’t go out. We have a really nice group of nerdy friends who hang out together — we are into games and we all hang out at different people’s houses, but never mine, because of my negative mother. He asked me if I would consider secretly meeting him to go alone for a pizza. What do you think? — Scared I’m Losing Him, Brandon

Dear Scared I’m Losing Him: Nameless faces are just plain scary to the parents of young teenage girls, so don’t sneak with this guy. That will set up mistrust for the rest of your dating career. Start inviting your group over to your house so your mom can get to know this guy. She might like him and trust him enough to let you start seeing him, but why would she trust boys she doesn’t know and hasn’t met, even casually?

Start with a board-games pizza party with four to six people. If your mom is there, welcome her to hang around a bit and help provide the food for it, she’ll get to know your friends without actually sitting down to play the games. A week later, get this special guy to help you with your homework when your mom is there. The point is she has to meet him a few times, talk with him and see what a nice guy he is. Then he’s not a stranger and will likely soften her dating deadline.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave. Winnipeg R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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