Getting stiffed on bill well worth the investment

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 01/06/2017 (3412 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I ran into a guy who used to be a friend. We carpooled to university with other people for a year. He asked me to go for a drink and three drinks later he confessed he had a big crush on me in those days. He asked me if I felt the same and I told him the truth, that I didn’t.

Then he walked out of the bar and left me with the bill for both of us. I paid it and it wasn’t cheap — 30 freaking dollars. Now I’m mad, but what can I do?— Stuck Me With the Bill, Wolseley

Dear Stuck Me With the Bill: You will never hear from this guy again and if he sees you he’ll walk away fast. Sometimes it’s worth $30 to know those facts about a guy who has been a real jerk to you.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I had a long bath the other day and came out wrinkled like a prune. My husband teased me and called me pruney. It was moderately funny but he wouldn’t let up and now, days later, he’s still at it.

I don’t know how to stop him. When I cried, he said I was too thin-skinned. “Get it, haha, pruney,” and that sent him off into more giggles. I don’t know what to do.— Sickened By Him, Downtown

Dear Sickened By Him: The best way to stop a mean teaser like this is to warn him you’re going to have to strike back with a name of your own regarding something he will not want to be teased about. That is often enough to stop a teaser right there.

Everybody knows two or three things about themselves they are sensitive about and may have been teased unmercifully about as a kid. Where do you think they learned the techniques?

If the threat of retaliation doesn’t help, tell your immature husband you’re going to see a relationship counsellor either with him or alone because of this problem. Then do it.

Dear Readers: This is another reader’s letter about Not Letting This Go, the Grade 12 girl who hates a certain teacher for “hurting and humiliating her” in class all year and wants to complain, not just for her own self, but also because this teacher picks out a new girl every year and mistreats her. I suggested she get her marks first and then complain to the principal with her parents beside her. This is what the reader advised:

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: Regarding the letter from Not Letting This Go, the writer describes behaviour that is bullying, plain and simple. Bullying is not just from peers, it can be from anyone. I give her lots of credit for writing to you, for I am sure this happens more than we know.

I agree this student should continue to work hard at her studies and make notes about the teacher’s comments. I do think it should be addressed sooner than later and with a ton of evidence from others that have been through this. This teacher needs serious disciplinary action. No student should ever have to be subjected to this by a teacher at any age. School is to be a safe place where you can learn and go on to be the best person you can be.

This student should go to her parents, school adviser and/or principal, or even the school board ASAP. Who could even study with this on one’s mind? This teacher needs to know someone higher up is watching what she’s up to.

On the teacher’s side, she needs counselling about the way she behaves. Thanks and all the best to Not Letting This Go. Stand tall, you have a voice. — We’re All Equal as People, Manitoba

Dear We’re All Equal as People: Thanks for your letter. Clearly you care and spent a lot of time thinking out the best solution and the timing. The original writer will have to think out the best situation and timing with the help of her parents.

Most importantly, they must choose the best person to complain to and the principal may or may not be the best depending on his or her relationship with the teacher.

Going over the principal’s head to the superintendent is chancy, too. Sometimes a guidance counsellor, who knows all the personalities of the adults involved, is the best place to start.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

   Read full biography