By the time the pants came off he was no longer in the mood

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This article was published 07/09/2017 (2967 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: So I got this guy home and had to make him some coffee to sober him up a little and then got him undressed in the bedroom.

But, at the last minute he said, “I gotta tell you. I have a girlfriend. Is it all right with you if I just go home now? I don’t feel like doing this any more. I’m gonna call a cab.”

It was obvious his body wasn’t into it anymore either, so he got his useless you-know-what packed up and went home.

Why didn’t he tell me before he acted single and chased me around the club, necked with me outside against a wall and came home with me in my car? — Feeling Jerked Around, St. Vital

Dear Feeling Jerked Around: It may have been the level of alcohol in his blood at the club that helped him forget his other lady. All that matters is that he said no, even though you two were already undressed in the bedroom. Men and women have the right to say no to sex, even at the last minute.

The next time you meet a guy, ask him outright if he’s single. Also, don’t take him home to your place. You don’t know him well enough and he doesn’t know you.

If he’s interested at the club, ask him for his name and phone number and call him to go for a coffee. If that date doesn’t pan out, it wasn’t meant to be.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m a sad sack most of the time because I’m either chasing a woman, getting dumped by a woman or getting over the woman that came before her.

When I was young, women thought I was moody and that was sexy. I can’t keep woman around long now. I have a tendency to feel sorry for myself and never take the blame for anything I do wrong (so they say).

I don’t know where to go from here because I’m such a loser at love and I’m almost 35. I don’t want to be single. I have a great job, but no lady. What do you suggest? — Moody Guy, St. Boniface

Dear Moody Guy: Stop spinning your wheels with women for a bit and see a relationship counsellor to find out how to behave.

Learn how to honestly own up to things, take responsibility more and look for better matches.

When you’re in shape for a great new romance, keep seeing your relationship coach every few weeks to hash out any problems that arise, and be a winner.

Dear Readers: The letter below is in response to the older woman who discovered her gay brother’s purchases of ladies underwear and online flirtations with gay men when he was borrowing her laptop and forgot to log out.

She told the siblings travelling with them and wanted to know if the family should step in with warnings about his spending habits. I told her to mind her own business, or possibly lose the brother she says is so wonderful. Here’s someone else’s two bits:

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: This family group is well-established and approaching their senior years and realize frugality is necessary for those on fixed incomes.

Don’t you think the brother should be told in no uncertain terms he must use his own laptop for his activities? At least then the sister won’t have to view what he’s up to.

Also, it is not an invasion of privacy if that is an issue because she has the right to view/do anything she wants on her own laptop. — Fearless, Manitoba

Dear Fearless: If an older sibling used my laptop with my consent, I wouldn’t think it was my right to view everything written, nor to report any sex, romance or money topics to the rest of the family.

In this case, I would tell the brother I accidentally saw some very personal stuff and he had to use his laptop from then on.

I wouldn’t discuss his gay sex buddies, the ladies undies or the money he spends on such items. It’s not my business!

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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