Co-worker asked to use apartment to cheat on wife with male lovers

Opinion

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 26/04/2018 (2727 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m a gay man and have a nice apartment. I work with a bisexual married man, doing the same job. I’m going on a holiday for a month in the summer and he heard about it. He took me out to lunch yesterday and asked if he could use my empty apartment while I’m away. I couldn’t believe it. I know his wife and like her a lot. I was appalled, but didn’t want to cause trouble at work. I said I would have to see as they are redoing the hardwood floors in my apartment when I’m away, which is true.

I don’t want him using my place to see guys! I feel sick about this. What should I do?

— Can’t Find the Words, Winnipeg

Dear Can’t Find the Words: Getting your floors done usually requires you and your furniture to be out for two weeks because of the fumes. Give this nervy guy a two-pronged message (no, not the pitchfork he deserves for being a sneak and a user). Tell him nicely your apartment floors are going to be done sometime during that month, your furniture will be gone the whole month and nobody can be there while you’re away.

Then add pleasantly that along with that, you would feel guilty being part of helping to deceive his wife. That will ensure he doesn’t ask you again. Then change the subject fast to get over the awkwardness and don’t bring it up again, even if he’s cool towards you for a time. You are in the right!

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My girlfriend has terrible bad breath. I’ve urged her to see a dentist but she won’t. I can’t get near enough to kiss her most of the time and our relationship has become almost sexless. If she doesn’t brush her teeth immediately beforehand, we can’t have sex. I don’t think she cares if we don’t anymore. How do I tell her that I’m ready to break up with her because of her terrible halitosis?

— One Breath Away, St. James

Dear One Breath Away: In a way, she’s choosing to end your relationship. Tell her that you have tried very hard to get her to fight the problem that’s keeping you from enjoying her company and being intimate, and she has chosen to ignore it. Also mention she may be pushing other people away, such as co-workers and her boss.

The body gives out warning signals when something is wrong, and they should be heeded. Among the more serious causes of halitosis can be dry mouth, gum disease, rotten teeth, medications, infections and even cancer. Check out the Mayo Clinic website on causes at mayoclinic.org. Copy it out and hand it to her.

Maybe that will shock her into getting help. You could save your relationship and maybe even her life! If she still refuses to get help, then it’s time for you to give up on her, say adios and go looking for a sweetheart with a sweet mouth.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave.,Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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