Don’t let winter blues ice your marriage

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This article was published 30/10/2020 (2164 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: Winter is coming and I am more depressed than I’ve ever been about it — not clinically depressed needing drugs, just dragging my butt and feeling grumpy. My wife threatened me with “get a life or get another wife” so I’m writing you.

I hate the cold and the grey skies, snow dumps and shovelling — and now there’s COVID-19 in the mix as well.

What can I do to get out of this mood and get back into my wife’s good books?

Part of the reason she’s upset with me is I lose my sex drive when I’m low like this. I can’t help it because it just happens, and last year it was bad. My wife is very attractive and young and this is not an empty threat. Help! — Serious Trouble With Winter Coming, Charleswood 

Dear Trouble: Fresh air and exercise are a combo that usually hypes up sex drive. One of the happiest winter survivors I know took up snowshoeing a few years ago — and anybody can do it. She and a few tight friends can hardly wait for the snow to show up big time, not just a sprinkle.

Others prefer to slip along over the snow, so cross-country skiing is better for them. And some less physical types just want to drive to different locations using a GPS and map, and then get out and walk in search for prizes. That’s called geocaching and here’s a site for it: travelmanitoba.com/blog/post/geocaching.

Sunlight in winter can also rev up your sex drive. The white snow reflects sunshine and a simple walk with your face in the sun can pick up your mood. Inside the house, fight your down mood by choosing music that elevates your mood — not more somber tunes that keep you in a low mood.

Opt for more lighting in the house, as well. If you suspect you are low because of Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), buy a SAD light and use it daily when up get up in the morning and again in the dark evening. You can fight this and feel sexual again, and make your wife happy, too.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: Thanks for publishing my letter signed A Good Surprise, about welcoming a new sibling into our family. (In the switch-to-twin-beds debate, the writer’s father got twin beds, and then a baby at age 50. -Miss L.)

They’d been trying to start a family for several years. In fact, I had been married for five years, when they shared the joyous news. Plans were made to relocate dad’s upstairs den/office to the finished basement.

We were quite puzzled as to why. He said it was “to make room for the baby.” I am the happily-retired oldest sib and the little one now sits on the bench. Hope it gave people a positive boost.— Regards, M.

Dear M.: Sounds like a great family! All that matters is the baby was welcomed and is loved to bits.

I know about late babies personally. I had children at 38 years old and then six weeks from 40. To celebrate the two babies being happy and healthy, we had a big birthday party in the backyard for 50 friends, who took turns handing these happy babies around for cuddles.

Many of the guests had late babies as well. As older parents, we drifted into an informal club where we’d get together on a Sunday with the babies and toddlers (one couple had twins!) playing on the rug in the middle. Happy times!

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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