Lazy, loving Sundays can help you through week

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This article was published 16/01/2022 (1671 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: Life in the fast lane is catching up with me, and I’m a lousy lover to my lady now. I’m doing the work of two people and it’s pretty much a sleep-and-work existence.

My girlfriend is staying at my house during COVID as she’s also working extra hours. Otherwise, we’d never see each other at all!

We may be sleeping together but we’re not having much sex, I’m sorry to say. Why? Our shifts don’t usually match and we’re so dog-tired at home. She says she doesn’t care if we’re practically celibate, but I know she secretly does care. She used to be a pistol, just like me!

The only day we’re both off work together with any regularity is Sundays. Then we scramble to catch up on six days of household chores and cooking for the week. Please help us.

— Missing the Lovin’, Southdale

Dear Missing It: Here’s the deal you need to make together to get through COVID. You two need to sleep in on Sundays. Don’t waste time housecleaning, other than throwing in the wash. Then, order in a bunch of healthy food. That will leave “relaxing time” to enjoy each other.

Make love in the afternoon — and evening too, if you want to. Just be lazy together, and have fun. Sunday is your dedicated Loving Day.

The other six days, take the pressure off each other by agreeing you have no expectations of sex on those days. If it happens, great — but it’s just a bonus!

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My wife told me we have a new neighbour — a police officer. She said she feels much safer while I’m on the road, having him nearby.

Well, I don’t feel so safe now! Every time I call, she mentions this neighbour. Since when was my wife appointed the Welcome Wagon?

I’m working out of province on complicated projects many months a year. My wife is very attractive and I’ve never had reason to mistrust her. But for whatever reason, I can tell she’s really taken with this cop.

My best friend — a guy I work with — says there’s a thing called “badge bunnies” — a name for women who are crazy about cops, and chase them. Is this true? In my gut, it feels like a threat to me. What can I do about this?

— Always Trusting My Gut, Winnipeg

Dear Trusting: Some women find themselves attracted to guys in uniform and that includes police, military men and firefighters. Not that these women are invited out on calls with them, but they’re attracted to imagined action and heroism.

Some so-called “badge bunnies” will even speed to get stopped for a ticket and flirt with the officer — with some even trying to play the “I’ve been a bad girl” game. Other women just like the tough-guy-in-control image, which may be how you got in the door of your woman’s heart. You’re away doing manly man’s work, aren’t you?

So what can you do about this? Don’t keep quiet any longer. Shine a light on the situation. Rather than keeping your jealous feelings in the dark, tell your lady how you feel when she goes on and on about this policeman.

She may not have noticed herself doing this, or she may have thought you were so insensitive that you didn’t notice. Ask her outright if she has a little crush on him.

Then take the next opportunity you can to make an excuse to meet this guy and get to know him a little. You might like him, and he might relax and tell you he’s embarrassed by the attention he’s getting from the ladies in the neighbourhood.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

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Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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