Put family safety before fretting about image

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 24/05/2022 (1564 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: Motorcycle season is back, and the potholes are horrendous. I’m terrified of riding in a way I never used to be. I just feel like I’ve lost my nerve to get on two wheels this summer.

Problem is, the family loves riding on the back of my bike with me. My wife and I were planning to take the cruiser on the highway this year.

Everybody seems so excited to ride, but suddenly I don’t feel the same way and don’t know how to break the news to them. Should I just man up, face my fears and ride anyway? I’m torn. It just doesn’t seem worth it, but I don’t want to hurt anyone either.

— Ragin’ Cager, Tuxedo

Dear Ragin’: It’s better to have your wife and kids mad at you for discontinuing the rides than to give in too early. Imagine one of your precious family riding with you, hitting a pothole and then flying into the air and sustaining injuries.

“Manning up” in the spring of 2022 could mean retiring the bike for part of the season, putting up with the family flak, and keeping everybody safe. When you can finally test out the repaired streets and roads carefully (in your car), maybe you’ll feel right about taking the motorcycle out again alone — and the next time with a precious family passenger.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m furious with my first husband, who is, I admit, a very talented artist. I already had a professional job when I met him and moved him in. I was always more than fair with him — never expecting rent money from him, or his full half of food and bills.

When we got married, I bought us a tiny home and called it Honeymoon House. Sadly, I found out you can’t live on love and sex alone. I grew to resent his getting pretty much a free ride.

When we broke up, I’d had enough of supporting him, and I’d already found a wonderful new man with his own successful career.

My artist was absolutely heartbroken. So, being the kind person I am, I let him buy that little house for a pittance. We went to a lawyer and I signed it over to him legally. Then he had a place to live and make his art, and I didn’t feel so guilty.

But this year, I guess my ex got sick of being a starving artist. He’s got himself a younger girlfriend with a job, and he got himself a decent-paying job, too. Then, she moved in and they fixed up our house together. Fair enough, I guess!

But now, I hear that little rat has just sold Honeymoon House for a ridiculously high price! I’m thinking some of that money should be mine, shouldn’t it? Doesn’t he owe me something in a fair world?

— Wanting My Fair Share, Fort Rouge

Dear Wanting: You legally sold him the little house, not knowing what would happen to its value. He fixed it up and sold it in this much better housing market. That was the chance you took. You can’t take back ownership now.

You may feel it’s not fair, but consider this: that’s how he felt when you replaced him with another man, and then dried his tears by selling him the home for a pittance.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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