Pre-arranged rides home could help roust tipsy aunts

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This article was published 15/12/2022 (1384 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: Christmas Day is coming, and so are the old grand aunties from my side of the family. This is the first time we’ve invited them for dinner in a while, because of COVID.

I’d kind of forgotten what they’re like. Oh, how those ladies love to drink, and from big wine glasses! They can go all night playing cards. And, they’re not cheap! They bring tons of food and their own champagne supply. As the evening wears on, they call out “More drinkies!” as they pour.

The thing is, I love them, but they always want to stay late, and I want them to go home. Unfortunately, my wife who was brought up Mennonite, thinks they’re a hoot — nothing like this ever went on in her family! How can I get them out of here and home safely at a decent time?

— Getting Tough on Tippling Aunties, Fort Richmond

Dear Tough on Aunties: Pick up the ladies in your vehicle, and pre-book a safe cab ride home for them, on you. When the driver arrives, they have to go home! Ring a festive bell when the cab is on its way, and then help them pack up. Kiss them all goodbye, and say, “See you again soon. Happy Holidays!” Then pre-pay the driver, who is solving your problem, and tip generously.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: Last year my wife announced she was pregnant on Christmas Eve. We were ecstatic! We have a beautiful baby girl now. It is a wonderful experience, but our baby is not a good sleeper. We have a lot of night-time disturbances in this household. My wife can go right back to sleep after being up with our baby, but I lie there and start thinking about my work and money problems, since my wife went on maternity leave. I have a lot of weight on my shoulders.

Yesterday, to my shock, my wife told me how much she loves being a mother and how much she’d like to quit work and have more kids — like three more. I felt sick, and went dead quiet. We had talked about “two kids, max” after we got married.

I’m not a guy who wants to work like a dog to earn money, while my wife quits her six-figure career to stay home and have multiple kids. The thing is, she just sprung this on me. In fact, we had agreed not to have a big family because she loved her profession.

Money is tight this Christmas, and I can’t wait until my wife goes back to work full-time, and our financial pressures ease up. I haven’t told her how bad it is, as she’s a new mother. How much should I tell her?

— Worrying Every Night, Winnipeg

Dear Worried: You’re right to tread lightly, as some new moms experience a lot of different emotions, along with the physical demands. But, you can confess to your wife you’re “a bit worried” about money these days. Then open the books for her perusal, and ask her to help you with the budgeting.

Your wife will figure out on her own, that you two need a breather between babies, as both parents need to contribute financially. She may also figure out that the “stay-at-home mom” idea, is a sweet notion, but often not workable, unless Dad is bringing in a lot of money.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

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