Cancel cruise and swing back into wife’s arms
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Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 03/01/2016 (3559 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.
Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My wife and I are former swingers — we stopped about 10 years ago. I did something terrible over the Christmas holidays: I told a big lie to my wife to get her to stop working and retire with me. I was mad, so I told her I was going travelling without her on a long trip and I would be “free as a bird” when I was on the cruise ship. She said, “Go right ahead!” So, I studied a bunch of cruises and booked one, but today I overheard my wife on the phone telling her best friend that she is going to feel free to sleep with someone else, too, when I’m away.
I know this is unfair, but I can’t stand the thought of her cheating on me. For me, having sex would just be a roll in the hay, but for her it would be somebody she really likes. It could be the end of us. That would kill me — she is the woman I really love. We used to be swingers in our early days, but we always did it as a couple and I could keep an eye on her and make sure it never got serious. She is still very good-looking and I’m in a panic. Should I tell her I lied about cheating or cancel my trip?
— Pushed Her Too Far, Windsor Park
Dear Pushed Her Too Far: Yes! You should confess you lied and tell her you planned the trip to get her to retire and spend time with you. She’s not ready to retire and she’s doing what she needs to do — continue working. How about cancelling the big trip and asking her to go somewhere with you on a smaller trip? She may not want to go anywhere with you right now. Don’t complain about that. She may even have had her eye on someone in particular (you trained her well with the swinging). At any rate, you would be a fool to take off on this long cruise. Try to win back her love and trust.
Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6
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