Dump boyfriend on his bullying butt
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Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 07/01/2016 (3554 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.
Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: Over Christmas, my boyfriend, who is 21, started disappearing from his Facebook, cellphone and email. When I finally got hold of him, I asked him why he could no longer be reached easily. He said he was teaching me a lesson, that I was calling too much, but “not giving him the right kind of loving he needs as a man.” He meant sex. He said that when he finally allows me to see him again, I would appreciate him and give him what he wants from me. I’m 18 and a good Mennonite and not ready to have sex. I know he’s trying to punish me so I’ll do what he wants. I told my one sister, who told our married sister what he was doing. She immediately told Mom and Dad. My dad was furious and he can be rough. He wants to punch my boyfriend’s face in. What do you think I should do? I don’t love him anymore, but I’m scared to break up. Should I talk to him one more time? — Not Stupid, East Kildonan
Dear Not Stupid: This guy is mean and nasty. You are only being “stupid” if you don’t get as far away from him as fast as you can. Tell him in an email you are finished, but you wish him well in life — even if you feel like saying angry words instead. Don’t give him the stimulus to come after you in a show of dominance and ownership. (He probably thinks he should be the one to decide on breaking up or not.) Do tell him your tough dad has gotten wind of the things he has said and done, and he’d be wise not to make any contact with you.
It’s doubtful he will bother you, because he is young enough not to like the sound of dad, and he is probably seeing someone else for sex already. That’s why he’s not seeing you anymore. It suits his ego to have you still on the line, though, and to know you’re suffering, so don’t mix with him beyond one talk online. Then block him from further communication.
Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave. Winnipeg R2X 3B6.
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