Too much sex with wife makes for exhausting life

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This article was published 14/01/2018 (3185 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I made a New Year’s resolution that I’m having a hard time keeping. My wife said she wanted us to have more sex, even if it isn’t Earth-shaking, so I made a foolish resolution to have sex with her 30 times in January.

Secretly, I thought if I made love to her every night for even a week, she would say that was enough. I thought she would be tired and want to take a break, but she didn’t. She’s loving it! She said, “I never loved you so much and I’ve never felt so beautiful.” Now she’s at me morning and night for more lovin’. We don’t have any children yet, but at this rate…

I work long days and need a shower, dinner and some rest at night. Now it feels like I have a second job to do — serving my lady’s every wish and desire. And the bad part is she’s so happy. What do I do after the month is up? Honest to God, I’ll want to retire, or at least take a break. Would getting her pregnant help?

— Slaving Away, West End

Dear Slaving Away: Some women get nauseous and tired when they’re pregnant, but some have never felt better — or hotter for sex. The only really good reason to get pregnant is that you’re ready to have a child and take care of a new life. The baby will become your new second job, though it will be harder on your wife than on you as she will be getting up for breastfeeding, and never get enough rest. She may leave you alone so much you don’t like it.

What we do know for sure is you can’t keep up this pace. You’ll have to confess that. Suggest a different deal to have wild sexy weekends and a couple of weeknights off where you can just relax. Maybe don’t relax on the bed. Be very careful in changing this deal. Tell your beloved you need some down time, without hurting her feelings. A hurt wife and a ruined sex life is no fun either.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My teenage kids are a lot of fun, but there’s something I don’t understand about them. They sleep so much, and they want to sleep late on Saturdays and Sundays — as late as 1 p.m. Since all three kids are like this, it must be normal, but what is going on? Other days of the week, they get along on seven hours. I think they just want to get out of weekend chores around the house, but my husband says to leave them alone because they need the rest to grow and function. Who is right? — Fed Up Momma, River Heights

Dear Fed Up Momma: Actually, your husband is right. People of all ages, but especially growing kids who participate in sports and other activities, can accumulate a sleep deficit every week that can be partially fixed by sleeping in once or twice on the weekend, but not fully. Sleeping in does not address all tired systems in the body, but it helps.

Help your teens to figure out how much sleep they personally need to function well per week. Each kid is different. Sleep experts say everyone needs to settle short-term sleep debt ASAP or it doesn’t help as much.

To address a critical long-term sleep debt, you need to plan time off or a period of time with just work or school and minimal extra activities. Then go to bed as soon as you’re tired and sleep until you wake up, with no alarm set. Most teens don’t even think of setting their own sleep schedules for a healthy life, but they should.

As for weekend chores, they can start those at 2 p.m. and still get things done.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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