Father covering up for lying, cheating son

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This article was published 03/04/2018 (3060 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I met a new man on the weekend and he was so popular with this group of hot young babes, I took it upon myself (age 29) to snag him. I took him by the tie in the end, leading him away from them, and said, “You’re coming with me.” He came home with me and stayed from Friday night until Sunday.

On Sunday, he got up and said he had to go home because his girlfriend would probably be looking for him, and laughed. I asked where he lived and it turns out he lives with his parents, but said his dad would cover for him like he always does. I was stunned. His dad would lie for him like that to the girlfriend?

I suddenly felt sorry for the girl. Why didn’t he tell me he had a girlfriend? Why was he out whooping it up with the guys and staying two nights at my place? I’m shaking my head in wonder. Would a guy’s grown-up father be that much of a jerk?

— Gobsmacked, Sage Creek

Dear Gobsmacked: Some fathers don’t ever grow up. They have a serious case of arrested development and are trying to live their glory years through their sons. Daddy may think it’s cool his son is a player, either because he was one himself and misses it, or because he was never hot enough to attract the girls himself.

Where do you think the son learned to be such a liar and a jerk? Probably dad. He certainly has his help and co-operation.

Stay far away from this guy, and also, get checked out by your doctor. This guy lacks responsibility and morals. If he had any disease to pass on, he would probably think it was your problem to handle, not his.

By the way, why would you go for the guy who has got girls hanging all over him and then take him right home for two days of sex?

Did taking him from the younger girls make him some kind of prize to you? It looks like you have a little thinking to do, too. As for the girlfriend in the background, did you not ask if he was seeing someone before taking him to bed? You had two days to find out. If a man says nothing about his love life, it’s smart to ask before the act, not after.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My 32-year-old boyfriend is a sweet man who never raises his voice, but then this woman started in on him at the cemetery and asked why he didn’t keep up his wife’s plot and said she’d never seen any flowers there. And wow, she struck a nerve! He turned red and started to yell at her.

She went running off, jumped in her car and took off. I was so surprised, my first inclination was to laugh, but I covered my face with the back of my hand. Mr. Mild Manners was hitting the flippin’ roof right beside me. That day I learned a new respect for him and his vocabulary for interfering strangers.

He’s mild-mannered all the time, but I guess I am still learning new things about him. Partway back to the city, he pulled over to the side of the road, took me in his arms and told me it was safe to laugh at him now. He said the woman in the cemetery reminded him of his former mother-in-law, who was an awful person who made his marriage very difficult, especially after his wife got sick. He said he felt like he couldn’t do anything right.

Just when you think you know someone, you find out you don’t. What other secrets does he have?

— Learning His Secrets, Winnipeg

Dear Learning His Secrets: While mild-mannered behaviour is nice in daily life, it’s good to be with someone who won’t take being browbeaten by a nosy person, or a nasty waiter or a pushy car salesman. Maybe watch your own p’s and q’s when you’re getting into nattering at this guy, who has limits.

Some people can’t stand to be bombarded with criticism and one critical remark does the job, if the job really needs to be done.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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