Sexy adventure should shake up stale Saturday scene

Opinion

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 07/04/2018 (2746 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My husband only wants sex on Saturday night. Well, where was he on Monday, Wednesday and Friday when I wanted it, and he wanted to watch Netflix or sports? I want to go out on Saturdays with our friends and dance and have fun, not stay home with him to make up for not having sex all week (that’s what he says). What an old fogey!

Where is the man I used to love, who was romantic, inspired and novel, and ready to go sexy zero-to-hero at different times in different places, in and out of the house? We don’t even have any kids! Where is the sexy guy I thought I married?

— Bored Stiff at 27, River Heights

Dear Bored Stiff at 27: It sounds like both of you have fallen into the trap of acting the way you think married people are supposed to act. Your husband has gotten into a once-a-week routine that sounds like laziness on his part. And you have fallen into the routine of doing what hubby wants. He leads, and you follow.

How could he possibly behave like this if you were making use of this empty house or apartment to create a wild place to have sex? Got costumes, buzzing toys, a massage table that slides out from under the sofa? When’s the last time either of you made a recording of your favourite seduction music?

You need to get out of that house to break the bad habits. Try a fantasy night at Mariaggi’s Theme Suite Hotel and Spa, which has 13 different rooms, at 231 McDermot Ave. (204-947-9447), or take him to the outdoor pools/indoor treatment spa Thermëa, 775 Crescent Dr. (204-284-6868).

Or get right out of town to blow his mind. Try a couples-only spot such as Tallpine Lodges at West Hawk Lake (1-866-349-2209) for two or more days or one of other several romantic cabin rental locations in Manitoba, such as Pinewood Lodge at Dorothy Lake in the Whiteshell (204-348-7549) or Barrier Bay Resort (1-866-735-9721) in the same area.

 

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My mother has a new boyfriend who is much younger than she is, like 15 years or so. (I’m afraid to ask!) They are rarely available to do anything social with the family now. Mostly they’re arriving home from a trip, or going on another one. This guy of hers retired early and saved and invested tons of money from his job, and my mother is well-fixed since my dad died.

We had them over for an Easter dinner with our family and the grandkids, who used to spend a lot of time with their grandma. But my mom sat on the sofa with her hand in her boyfriend’s, and one calf slung over his. I don’t know how to talk to my mother about this nonsense. She seems so happy, but she’s no longer acting like a mom to me or a grandmother to her grandkids. Please help.

— Mother Morphed Into Selfish Teenager, Winnipeg

Dear Mother Morphed into Selfish Teenager: Your mother has rediscovered having a youthful lifestyle with a man she loves, and they’re having a blast. Expect this stage to last a while. As a couple, they have money and free time and they love each other in every way, including the sensual. They don’t enjoy being around people who are doing the “tsk-tsk” disapproval thing.

If you want to see more of your mom, you’re going to have to accept that and buy into it. You might ask her out for breakfasts or lunches alone with you and the kids, and bring little toys and colouring books so they interact and play together. Good luck!

 

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: This note is in regard to the lady who called herself Going Crazy? because she’s been seeing little lights over her bed in the dark, and her husband could not see them. She could be having a problem with her retina which can be very serious. Occasional floaters can be OK, but bright flashing lights are not.

She needs to see her optometrist or optician just to make sure. It may be as you say, reflected lights from the street, but a detaching retina has the symptoms she describes. I have glaucoma, so have read a lot about vision problems. 

— Concerned, Charleswood

Dear Concerned: Thanks for writing in about this. This could possibly explain the husband not seeing the same thing his wife did when she peeked over the covers in the dark and thought she was seeing fireflies in the air, or something supernatural hovering in the bedroom.

 

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6