Spitting image surprise spurs curiosity

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This article was published 05/01/2022 (1719 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m a man with a lot of ex-girlfriends. A few of them get in touch at Christmas or new year’s, and they often send pictures. One of them sent a photo of herself and a little boy who looks just like me — he has my green eyes and bright red hair. She mentioned his age, and that he was very bright and likes to make jokes. That little boy would have been born within a year after we broke up. One of the problems we were having then was that she wanted to get a married and have children. At 28, I didn’t want that.

I now suspect she was already pregnant, or found out soon after the breakup. Do you think, as I suspect, that photo was a hint she wants me to get in touch with her and the boy? It could have been a baby by another red-haired man, but I somehow doubt it. What should I do?

— Feeling Shocked and Curious, St. James

Dear Shocked: There’s a chance the lady may just love red-haired men, but he could be yours if he was born less than a year after you split. You definitely should get in touch — not to reunite with the mother as a couple, but because you may be a father to a little boy. There’s no way you’d want a son of yours to wonder where his father was all his life, is there?

If it’s what your ex-girlfriend wants and you are the father, maybe you and your ex can be friends and you can participate in the boy’s life. He may end up with you as a bio-dad and another man as his stepdad one day — which is a lot better than never having known you when the chance was offered.

As for this ex-girlfriend who sent the photo, she has never asked for your help — and now she’s maybe just hinting you have a little boy. So get in touch, and find out what’s going on. She may have found herself another red-headed man in a hurry after you broke up.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I ate way too much for Christmas dinner and threw up in the bathroom beside the downstairs family room — and my younger brat cousins heard. They ran upstairs to report to the adults I was puking up my dinner. My mom came downstairs, and took me home right away. It was embarrassing!

Now Mom thinks we should get on the phone together and call my aunt. She wants me to tell her I threw up her dinner because it was so good that I ate too much. I think my aunt realizes that and it’d just make matters worse — so we should just forget it! Lots of people throw up after eating too much good food, right?

— Too Much Fuss, East Kildonan

Dear Too Much Fuss: Yes, some people do throw up at big dinners, and some hosts remember, and are a little embarrassed. Call your aunt, and everybody can forget it quickly. Express regret that the family dinner ended abruptly for some people, because of you. Your aunt won’t be angry, but she may have felt a little sad that you got sick on her food and had to go home early. She will be happy to hear from you, and you’ll feel better about your unfortunate upchucking.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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