Gift gaffe opens real can of worms for family

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This article was published 09/01/2025 (616 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: My husband broke my heart on Christmas Day when he mistakenly gave me the wrong present. It had my name on it, but the gaudy lime-green spangled top inside was a size small! I’m a full-chested larger woman, size 3XL, and I’m fair-skinned and blond so I always wear pastels — as my husband well knows.

I knew immediately who the green abomination was meant for — my husband’s younger co-worker. Early last fall, she was trying to start an affair with my man at our store where we all work, and I caught on.

To keep me and the kids, my husband promised the flirtation was over, but he didn’t fire her. She kept on working for our company, but at another location. Obviously, they’ve stayed “in touch” in more ways than one.

After opening the gift, I went into the bedroom and called up this piece of work and said, “I have your Christmas gift from my husband. He gave it to me by mistake, along with a sexy little card for you. Why don’t you come and get it — and bring my sweater with you. I asked him for a pastel-pink one.”

She let out a scream like I’ve never heard in my life. My husband even heard it from the doorway of the bedroom where he’d been listening in and took off for her place in his truck, but it turns out she wouldn’t even let him in. My expensive sweater was jammed into her mailbox, so he brought it back for me. I immediately threw it out.

I don’t know what to do now, so mostly I just cry — and so do my kids. Their dad has gone to stay at his sister’s place for now. Our marriage is in the trash. I don’t want him back. Please help!

— Can’t Stop Hurting, West End

Dear Can’t Stop: The constant crying in front of your kids could be doing emotional damage to them. See a counsellor and your doctor for some help to start getting you through the most painful part of this breakup. Then you can be more comforting and helpful with your children as a parent. Also, be sure to talk to the kids’ counsellors at school about what happened over the holiday break.

You’ll need to see a divorce lawyer ASAP to work out an agreement on important details such as who lives where, who has the children when, what is to be done about the home and vehicles, and how much is paid in support.

Then there’s the business ownership. A good lawyer for each of you — not a shared one — can make a big difference in these cases. The faster you each get your own working on this messy situation, the better for you and the kids.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My girlfriend is working at a Caribbean resort. At first, I got a lot of messages and some calls from her — she was so bored and lonely. But two weeks before Christmas, the number of messages dropped off dramatically.

I’m no dummy! She’s definitely found some “action” down there. Should I tell her we need to break up or secretly just start playing the same game that she is playing?

— Jilted, Winnipeg

Dear Jilted: Sneaking around will just make you feel bad about yourself in the end. So, call your girlfriend and insist on getting the whole truth. Maybe she’s just working double shifts — but maybe she does have a boyfriend or two.

If she’s got a guy, tell her you’re going to feel free to date anybody you please, without guilt. With any luck, you’ll be seeing someone you like way better than your ex by the time she comes flying back into the snow.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

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