Seeing three men at once is not prostitution

Opinion

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 30/08/2016 (3326 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I believe your answer to Single Again at 45 is wrong. I don’t understand you ladies — if you can call someone who sleeps with three different men and is lying to all three a lady. What right does she have to demand commitment from the guy in British Columbia when she is being a slut and she has not disclosed what she is doing to the poor sucker?

What makes her different from a man who uses three different women just for sex? You know and I know that the relationship with the guy in B.C. is going to wear out very quick and then she will be back to her same old ways. Your advice to continue dating and keeping the door open is wrong. In short, you are telling her to continue doing what she is doing. Obviously she does not measure up to the standards the guy from B.C. expects.

Do you have any idea how much it would hurt to discover that your loved one is cheating on you? Most decent people sleep with one person at the time, and if the relationship does not work, they move on, and with time they find another lover, but lying and taking advantage of three simultaneously is called prostitution. Have a good day. — Disgusted, Winnipeg

Dear Disgusted: Dating three people and having sex with them is not called prostitution, which involves selling one’s body, usually for money, drugs or food if a person is starving. But how do you know she’s having sex with the three men she’s dating? You are simply assuming she is sleeping with all three because she is seeing them and she says they keep her “happy and entertained. “ I agree, she is probably sleeping with the man in B.C., as she has deep emotions for him.

By the way, calling the person who wrote in to this column a dirty name is nasty and highly judgmental, and takes the power out of your arguments. Dating does not automatically mean sleeping around. It seems you have experienced being cheated on by the hurt expressed in your letter. For that, you deserve some sympathy. It is a terrible feeling.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I can sympathize with the young couple that doesn’t know how to cook. When I moved out, I actively hated cooking and lived on yogurt. I don’t love cooking now, but I can put together some nice meals. Here’s how I did it: Don’t put pressure on yourself. Think of it as “making dinner” instead of “cooking.” If you’re not used to preparing meat, start with ready-to-cook meats from Costco or M&M. Read the ingredients and you’ll see how easy some meat dishes are to put together. Salads are actually pretty easy to make and you can get creative — try starting there. Master a few side dishes such as mashed potatoes, baked potatoes and rice. Make big meals and refrigerate half for the rest of the week so you don’t get tired of it too quickly.

Once I got comfortable with it, cooking was a lot less painful for me. Have fun! — Not a Cook, Transcona

Dear Not a Cook: A lot of non-cooks in Winnipeg responded to this issue. Cooking shows are so popular on TV now that non-cooks are more embarrassed — some even ashamed — about their lack of knowledge. Soon the young couple from the first letter will discover they can put a little roast together with fresh vegetables in the oven, turn it to 325 to 350 F until they’re done, and have one good nutritious meal that will last for a few days.Ditto for a big pot of homemade chili. And chopping veggies for salad is easy.

The advice to buy one cookbook, such as a basic Best of Bridge, and not overwhelm themselves is the best. Thanks to everyone who sent in tips that I sent along for the young lovers who need good nutrition to really enjoy themselves in every room of the house!

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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