Knock to wife’s bean has her speaking like the Queen

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This article was published 04/10/2016 (3356 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My wife has turned into a prig. She is old-fashioned English and turns her nose up at people who don’t speak “the Queen’s English” — probably because they live in Canada and speak Canadian English! She recently started using fine china and silver on the table morning, noon and night, and we have endless books and magazines about the royals, as if I give a fig about them.

She wasn’t this way until she got a concussion in an accident. She’s been acting as if she’s 80 years old ever since. Actually her mother, who is 80 years old, came here from England to visit recently and acted younger and more fun than her daughter does.

Lately, my wife’s been talking about wanting to go back and live in the old country and she’s exaggerating her English accent. Why? Our life is here now, and has been since I was a young man and brought her here. She has enjoyed Canada for years. Why does she want to be an old-fashioned English woman and go back there now? She must be going nuts, and I’ve told her that. Do you think this could be the beginning of dementia?

— Severely Annoyed, Winnipeg

Dear Severely Annoyed: You don’t have to be daft to want to move back home and she may not be crazy about a husband who tells her to her face that face she must be “going nuts.” It’s not uncommon for people to want to return to their old family and homeland when they get older. In fact, a lot of people come to North America in their younger years and work hard to make money with the idea of returning to their place of birth to retire.

You speak of her concussion and a change, asking if your wife is reacting to a blow to the head. Maybe she should see a doctor and have that checked out, although it seems likely she just misses her mother, is homesick and imagined life back in jolly old England.

If she made a trip home, she might decide reality there is not what she imagined or she might want to stay. Is she looking for an escape from a cold marriage?

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My husband doesn’t like it when I show off our money by treating my friends to lunch. He says he never does that when he’s out with his friends, but then all his friends are as wealthy as stink, so why should he? I don’t run with the matching crowd to his. I’m at least 20 years younger than most of his friends’ wives, so what do we have in common? He sees my Visa bills and mouths off, saying basically it looks like he’s paying for all of us out of his big pockets, but it’s my Visa and I have my own job, so it’s my money I’m spending.

I call him the old cheapskate, which he hates because it’s true. Why does he think he has power over me and my spending? How can I get him to change his tune, or shut his beak?

— Paying for My Friends, Winnipeg

Dear Paying for My Friends: Clearly he doesn’t have power over you because you spend your own money the way you like. Maybe he thinks his money and yours as combined family money. He may also think because of his age, experience and wealth, he has a right to be critical. And yes, some wealthy people are tight with money, though not all. Did you marry him out of love for him personally or did you just like him and look forward to the lifestyle he would share with you?

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts
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