Men making passes at girl without glasses

Opinion

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This article was published 02/12/2016 (3238 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I wear glasses every day because I can’t see without them. I have large eyes and long eyelashes that sometimes sweep the glass if I wear make-up. My boyfriend has requested I get contact lenses because he thinks I would look “even more beautiful.” I told him to take a hike and he dropped the subject. I don’t want to look more beautiful except for when I’m with him in bed, and then I take my glasses off anyway.

I used to have guys following me down the street. The glasses are a way of looking more studious and serious and keeping them away. How would my boyfriend like it if he heard guys remarking, “Hey, baby. Hey brown eyes!” on the street? Am I being too stubborn?

— Hot Eyes are a Curse, North Kildonan

Dear Hot Eyes are a Curse: Wear whatever you feel comfortable wearing. If you wear plain serviceable frames, maybe there’s a middle ground, such as buying an additional pair of more attractive glasses for when you go out on dates. As for your security on the city streets, consider taking a women’s street fighting/protection course and wearing a body alarm. Bottom line: do what you have to do to feel safe and never mind what your boyfriend wants. You’re not dictating to him what he wears or how he styles his hair, are you?

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I met a very sweet man on the weekend and gave him my phone number and address, then to my surprise, he dropped in. I found that a bit invasive and interesting that he used my address and didn’t call first. Shouldn’t he know better? I didn’t let him in because I was just about to have a bath. He hasn’t contacted me since. Help! I actually like him and think he’s funny.

— What To Do? River Heights

Dear What To Do: It’s your turn to make a little advance! He probably felt he overstepped his bounds and was on your bad-bet list now. You can change that by calling and inviting him to meet you for coffee and cake at a local dessert place. It’s a sweet way to get to know one another better and more appropriate for your comfort level. You don’t owe him an invitation to your house right away to make up for not letting him in the first time. That was very bold on his part.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My new girlfriend and I are in our mid-70s and we are sneaking around. We’re both sexually active and crazy about each other, but we don’t want our families to know. The other night I stayed over at her place and she invited me to stay the whole weekend. I had a bag in the car in case she asked me.

My grown daughter threw a fit on Sunday because she couldn’t find me at my house, although she noticed I hadn’t left my fancy jacket, boots or wallet home, and my toothbrush was gone. She is quite the little detective! I don’t want to discuss my new girlfriend with my family yet. What should I say?

— Nobody’s Business, Tuxedo

Dear Nobody’s Business: Say in a joking manner: “Guess what, kid! Dad has a new girlfriend and I’m not ready to discuss it yet with you or anybody. If there’s an emergency, you can call me and I’ll take my cell with me.” If she abuses the strict calling privilege, tell her you’re not going to answer the phone any more. You deserve your privacy and no calls when you are in the bedroom. Good on ya! Have a great time.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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