Cousin’s husband doesn’t want your lovin’

Opinion

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 13/12/2016 (3226 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m crazy about my cousin’s husband and they are coming for Christmas dinner again this year, which makes my heart beat faster just thinking about. My mother took me aside yesterday and warned me not to drink any alcohol at the party or in any way loosen up my inhibitions because last year I was all over my cousin’s husband. He is a well-known musician and I made a fool of myself when I tried to park myself on his lap when he was trying to play a Christmas song. He told me to get off of him.

Last year I didn’t bring my own boyfriend because I knew this hot guy my cousin had just married was going to be there. Do you think I should invite my boyfriend this year as a kind of shield? My aunt told my mom her daughter (my cousin) said she will “break my face” if I get drunk and go after her husband again. I wonder why they’re even coming again. Anyway, I need some advice on how to act because when he comes in the door, I will totally lose my cool. — Crazy For Him, North End

Dear Crazy for Him: First, my deepest condolences to your poor boyfriend. In the new year, make a resolution to find a real boyfriend who makes you feel the things you feel for your cousin’s husband. In the meantime, the reality is you need to behave yourself or there’s going to be trouble and possibly bloodshed when your nose breaks. The warning your aunt gave your mother was a serious one.

So, ask your boyfriend to come for the evening, totally stay away from Mr. Hottie and make it a pleasant experience for everyone. Drink something you enjoy that isn’t alcohol and eat lots of turkey so you’re sleepy instead of hot-to-trot after dinner, when the live music starts. It’s far better you do this and act like a gracious lady than repeat last year’s performance that made the musician sneer at you. Keep reminding yourself he doesn’t like you and it will help you to cool off.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: A cute guy I like from work finally asked me out, but asked if I could pick him up because he doesn’t have a car. I don’t have a car either. The conversation kind of stalled after that. Neither one of us mentioned taking the bus, like in junior high. I said, “Well, I guess that won’t work then unless…” thinking he would suggest taking a cab, but he just said in a snotty voice, “You’re right. A guy’s got to have some pride.”

So why didn’t he offer to pick me up in cab? We were going to go out to a club to drink and dance, and would have needed a cab home. It’s not like he doesn’t have any money. I’ve seen the kind of tips he gets at the end of night, and he often cabs it home. — Feeling Jerked Around, South End

Dear Feeling Jerked Around: You could have said, “Well then, are you coming to pick me up in a cab? What time should I be ready?” But he was doing the asking and probably should have suggested it himself. It could be you just dodged a cheapskate. And who needs a romance at work?

It sounds like he’s used to women driving him around and thought it was OK to ask. Perhaps you are also used to guys picking you up in their cars? You are not a good match. Instead of eight wheels between you, there were zero.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

   Read full biography