Leave decision to fate, heart and mind

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 22/06/2018 (2673 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I met a man on the bus who intrigued me. I thought nothing of it, just passed it off.

Then, I saw him again on the bus and he smiled and gestured to ask if he should join me. So polite!

Then, I met him the third time on the bus. There is a superstition about meeting No. 3 in a short time period. We are supposed to know each other in the grand scheme of things and are fated to meet!

I asked him to get off the bus and go for coffee with me. We talked for three hours, looking into each other’s eyes.

Then, he said he had to tell me something — that he was married and his wife loved sex, but not with him. She only liked sex with herself and didn’t need a man.

He said she seemed to him to be attracted to women, but she wouldn’t admit it — even to herself. She got pregnant the first time they had sex and that’s why they got married. They have an adolescent son.

Then, he said something that shocked me: “Would you ever consider being someone’s mistress?”

I said, “That’s an old-fashioned word.”

Then, he said, “I’m an old-fashioned guy, and I think a father should stay in the house to raise his children and be a real dad if possible.”

I said I might fall in love with him and be jealous of his wife. He said that was a danger, but if it happened he would leave his wife and marry me as soon as his son left home for university.

Then, he kissed me and the whole world exploded.

What do I do now? I’m in love and so is he, but I don’t want to wait eight years. I believe in fate though. 

— Rock & a Hard Place, Broadway

Dear Hard Place: You and I both know you’re not going to stop seeing this guy at this point.

You don’t really know if you’re in love with him yet, but you have a big initial physical attraction and you are great communicators. I doubt you’ll walk away because nothing this exciting has ever happened to you before.

You don’t say how old you are and if you want a family — or if you already have children. He may not want more children, considering how chained he is to this woman by the accidental pregnancy.

Since you believe in fate, why not see what fate brings.

When you don’t know what to do, stand still, look and listen.

Allow yourself to say, “I don’t know what to do yet, but I will in a bit.” Ask a lot of questions and gather information. Just do what has to be done on a day-to-day basis and see what happens. You will get a yes or no answer from your heart and your mind after a time.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave. Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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