Winter weight gain no day at the beach

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Opinion

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 08/07/2018 (3009 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: After a couple of glasses of wine for courage, I got out my gorgeous designer bathing suit — and tried my best to wiggle it on. I couldn’t get that suit up over my fat derriere.

Then I got on the scale and saw I’d gained 28 pounds of ugly fat over the winter! That’s three large Sunday pork roasts, most of it spread on my butt and stomach.

My husband laughed at me and said, “I told you that you shouldn’t be eating chips and dip and cookies and cooking big meals, and drinking cocktails all the time.” He said I “lose control and pig out almost every night.”

I swore at him, but I guess that’s true. What should I do? Hold off swimming, which I love, until I’m 28 pounds thinner and can wear my expensive designer suit as a reward? Or, give in and buy a new suit that fits and I can stay fat?

— Big Butt Swimming Blues, Wolseley

Dear Big Butt: Buy a cheap suit and swim at pools and lakes around the city and aim for getting back into the expensive suit by August. Depriving yourself of swimming here in Winnipeg and at the beautiful lakes in Manitoba will just make you angry and frustrated. Getting mad leads to rebellion and binge eating.

As for wanting fizzy drinks, a lot of drink companies are making diet beers and flavoured sparkling waters, some without fake sugar sweeteners, so you still get the bubbles and feel like one of the gang when you’re partying. And bring healthy food and munchies to parties. Substitute, don’t sacrifice, this summer, Nobody loves a martyr at a beach party.

You might be tempted to skip parties and other social gatherings and just stay home. Big mistake. You’ll just get resentful and lose your willpower again.

Exercise is great, but you have to know that eating less-fattening foods is necessary too. It takes a lot of exercise to wear off one glazed doughnut. Better to make popcorn your friend this summer. The internet is full of healthy eating choices and, whether you know it or not, your body is craving the goodness of fresh veggies and fruits. Outdoor markets are full of healthy food and entertainment, and they’re all over Winnipeg now, so get out there!

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I bought a stash of women’s porn from someone on the internet and I can’t leave it alone. It seems like I haven’t been out for weeks; I’m holed up with my AC, chilled booze, take-out Chinese food and my titillating entertainment. Women’s porn is hard to find — I got it on a super-private sale.

My two best friends are joking about staging an intervention to get me outside. They’re just jealous because I’m not sharing. It’d be embarrassing to sit there and enjoy it with them. Secretly, I am a bit worried as I have a tendency to get addicted to stuff. Help!

— Losing My Grip, St. Vital

Dear Grip: Compromise by going out to movies at a theatre where the temperature is perfect and it’s still a social occasion.

You can still watch a movie screen since that’s part of what you’re addicted to, but at least you won’t lose your friends to a porn addiction.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave. Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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