Get a makeover or risk losing girl, Poindexter

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 11/06/2016 (3448 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I am a nerd in my 20s and quite comfortable with it. My mom watched the movie Revenge of the Nerds with us when we were little, and she said quite seriously that nerds would rule the world one day. Now we are in the electronic age and I am up to my fat butt in technological innovation. My girlfriend was a nerd too, until recently when one of her girlfriends took her out for some kind of makeover, and and she’s turning into a fashionista with new hair and clothes — the whole bit.

Last night she got on me about being “an obvious nerd” and wanted to take me shopping with her and this friend of hers. I said absolutely not. Now I feel self-conscious when I’m with her at the bar. I don’t match these fancy people, although I have good rhythm and can dance as well as they can. But I’m far from cool. I feel us drifting apart. She goes out to the bar with these friends — both guys and girls — on Saturday nights. I love her. Please help.

— Nerd Definitely Losing, Winnipeg

Dear Nerd Definitely Losing: Her friend can get lost. Why not take your girlfriend up on her offer? Let her dress you up and go with her and have some fun. At least give it a try or two. Show her that you are willing to invest in the relationship. You mention you are a good dancer, so it won’t be a painful stretch to wear cool clothes and have a good time. It’s isn’t all about you, and we’re only talking about Saturday night. What do you have to lose, besides the woman you love?

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I would like to address the problem of restless legs, as they are no fun for the sufferer. The impression one gets hearing about restless leg syndrome is that little can be done about it, discouraging sufferers from seeking medical help. Help is available, however.

I speak from experience. Botched hip surgery three years ago left me with, besides chronic pain, increasingly restless legs, and ultimately, huge knee-to-chest spasms which could go on for hours. I was already taking calcium, which had no effect. Recently a friend taking gabapentin after back surgery thought it might help me. A doctor agreed, and prescribed it. The nightly spasms stopped immediately, with only an occasional tic if I get overtired. The chronic pain is also blocked, and life has returned to normal. Just thought I’d pass it on.

It could be as simple as taking one calcium and magnesium pill each day. Otherwise, gabapentin can be prescribed. It’s a nerve blocker originally developed for epilepsy, now prescribed for both anomalous nerve pain and restless leg syndrome. It’s a nerve blocker, not a painkiller, is not addictive, and doesn’t conflict with other medications.

The wife in the letter from Terrible Sleeps might benefit from a good night’s sleep herself while her husband sleeps unscathed in the conjugal bed — it’s a lot more cosy and cheaper than a second bed to be shifted between sex and sleep

— A Follower Abroad

Dear Follower Abroad: My pharmacist connection agrees gabapentin is commonly used to block pain transmission for many conditions. It would certainly be worthwhile for this restless leg sufferer to ask her physician about it, since it is difficult for both her and her husband.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

   Read full biography