Stylish dressing really not hemmed in by size

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This article was published 07/11/2022 (1368 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: This is in regard to “Bad Dresser.” (He’s 18, claims he’s “pudgy,” and only wears jeans, T-shirts and big jackets — but desperately wants to buy clothes that suit him better. —Miss L.)

I mentioned to my daughter that some clothing companies use plus-sized male models now, and she showed me something on Instagram about one. Zach Miko is the model’s name. I googled him too, and found lots of stuff. The guy gives great advice to plus-sized men, and definitely can show “Bad Dresser” how to rock the jeans, T-shirt and big-jacket look.

— Dad Bod, Manitoba

Dear Dad Bod: If “Bad Dresser” wants a pictorial guide to take for his shopping spree, he can definitely google this “brawn” model Zach Miko, and he’ll see plenty of great clothing on him, looking fantastic. Miko is not shy anymore, and even models bathing suits that suit him. Thanks to you and your daughter for this great idea.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m secretly pretty lonely, because my girlfriend doesn’t love me the way I am. She wants me to become something else — more like the guy she used to be with, but he turned violent with her.

Nobody can please her, it seems. She doesn’t want anybody as pushy as her dad — an ex-football player — but she doesn’t respect anybody who can’t push her around, either. She thought, because I was also a football player, I’d be in her father’s “tough guy” league. Then she found out I’m really a big softy and want to please a woman any way I can.

The first time she called me her “big teddy bear,” I thought it was a compliment. Now I know it really means “you big pushover.” Please help me. I just broke up with her.

— Confused Beyond Belief, south Winnipeg

Dear Confused: When your heart and brain feel “jerked around,” your fastest path to getting things straightened out is to see a psychologist. They can help you untangle and understand the whole mess. Then it’s far less likely to happen again with a similar woman, which can be the biggest danger, if left untreated.

The most important outcome of your counselling will be to end up clarifying the kind of woman you actually do need. Then your eyes will be wide open, and your brain will be quietly sorting the people you are attracted to. When you choose well, your gentle and loving teddy-bear personality will be valued.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: The last thing I wanted to do was fall “in love” with the new guy next door, but it happened. He and his folks moved in during the summer, but he was away lifeguarding. Now he’s home and going to college, and the worst part is I can see he has a steady girlfriend already. I’ve been gathering information, like the lil detective I am, and it hurts to see them making out in his car!

On her hand, I see she’s wearing a big, men’s ring. I found out from his little sister that this girlfriend’s family is a big one, too. That’s why their make-out spot is in his family’s driveway. Unfortunately, I’m tortured, because I can see them from my upstairs bedroom window.

When he comes out of his house, I’m always leaving for classes at exactly the same time. Perfect! When I’m just starting my little car, I always give him my special wave. I really need to get him away from her. Help me, please.

— Wanting Him Badly, St. Vital

Dear Wanting: Luckily, most late teens don’t marry their high school sweethearts anymore, so you can relax a little. If you want to be put on his mental waiting list, try to become a casual friend, not just the “morning wave” girl. When he finally leaves home — or you do — there’s room for you to start a fun friendship, and see how it goes, possibly give her a run for her money. But the best advice for right now is to stop stalking him in his driveway, and just plan to run into him once in a while outside, so you can actually talk to him.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

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Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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