Husband needs wife to repel old girlfriend

Opinion

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 01/03/2018 (2781 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: Far away in another country, live all my relatives, old and young.

There is no one here in Canada, just my Winnipeg wife and children. I’m longing to go see my family back home and have asked my wife to go again and she says, “What for? I can’t speak with them. I don’t know the language.” I told her I’d translate.

I know she doesn’t like my family. She was there before and she could tell by the expressions on their faces they didn’t approve of her. She wasn’t wrong!

They think she’s a floozie who stole their “boy” away on a holiday.

That’s exactly what happened, but my wife is not a floozie. She’s just a modern woman.

Anyway, yesterday I asked her outright to come with me, because I’m going and we’ll bring the kids to see their grandparents, aunts and uncles.

She said: “The kids can’t talk to them, either.”

I yelled in desperation: “I will translate everything.” She shrugged and said: “It’d be easier for everyone if you went by yourself.”

Well… not exactly. I have an old girlfriend over there who everyone expected I’d marry and she’s still single and in love with me.

You see what I mean? I need my wife for protection, but how can I tell her that? 

— Want To Visit My Home, Winnipeg

Dear Want: So tell her about the old girlfriend!

If you must be delicate, put it like this: “there’s a woman back home who was supposed to be my wife and she’s still single and in love with me. Please come with me, so the family doesn’t try to throw us together, with an idea of getting me back to live there. If I came home alone, they’d start coming up with schemes. I need you to come home with me.”

You might also point out you lost 100 per cent of your face-to-face family contact by marrying in Canada and she has lost nothing.

She owes it to you, to make some visits home with you to your family and country, in my view.

As for how your family treats her, that’s another serious problem and you will have to be clear with your mother and father that there must not be a repeat of what happened before and be specific about what your wife and you noticed in the first visit.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave. Winnipeg R2X 3B6