Husband might be a boob, but best to forgive and forget

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 29/07/2020 (2222 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I’m a woman with smaller breasts, and while I find it nice that men nowadays seem less interested in buxom women, I recently found out my husband, who claimed to be a fan of my “champagne glass” breasts, wasn’t being honest. He secretly has a porn stash. It’s in the bottom of a pile in the shed at the lake, and at least 50 per cent of it features women with massive breasts. These were NOT ancient magazines.

In his defence he says, “I married you, didn’t I? So how much does it matter to me?” Still, I feel betrayed to find out that, when nobody is looking, he basically goes for the big ones — and what he says to me is a cover-up.

My best friend thinks it’s no big deal, but then she’s a big-breasted woman. I used to feel petite and proud.

— Now Wavering, Elmwood

Dear Wavering: If you fell in love with a man and he wasn’t built sexually in a way that excited you, should you be forgiven for lying to be kind and make him feel good? What if he found you with a stash of naked magazines featuring men with much hotter bodies than he’ll ever have? Should he laugh it off? After all, you married him, didn’t you?

I think you should try to forgive him, burn the stash at the lake and remain petite and proud.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My live-in boyfriend is an older guy of 28 who’s obsessed with going to “the clubs,” as he calls them, particularly indoor/outdoor drinking and eating places in the summer. Every time he and “the boys” get together for a night on the town, I just can’t take it.

Thankfully, because of the coronavirus, they hadn’t been able to go out to clubs much, but some are starting to open again. He and his guys were “on it” immediately. How can I show him he is too old to be dressing up and going out every weekend? I was enjoying our time together, thanks to COVID-19. Isn’t that pathetic? And now that restrictions are letting up, I’m…

— Anxious Again, South Winnipeg

Dear Enough: You are so homebound and domestic, he thinks he can treat you like his mom. He still goes out to play like he did when he was single. No worries! He knows you’ll be at home waiting for him.

Are you naturally a “stay at home” person, or does your boyfriend not want to take you with him? Is it because he likes being with the guys — and around single women — drinking, joking and flirting?

Once this virus is conquered with a vaccine, try this: Start going out more with him, and with your girlfriends. It will keep him on his toes. Even now, you can go for physically distanced dinner on patios with a girlfriend or two. But if your natural inclination is to be a stay-at- home person, it’s time to look for a different kind of boyfriend to spend your life with.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m in so much trouble! My brother is madly in love with this girl from school, and all of us are online or on our phones all the time. Well, I told somebody who told somebody who told the girl he loves. Now the girl is embarrassed, and passed word back that she has no interest in my brother. He found out I was the one who blabbed and that’s what caused her nasty return message to be passed his way via other people.

Now my favourite brother is not talking to me and it’s horrible. I was so upset I told our mother and she spoke to him. Now he’s doubly embarrassed about the crush and what happened because the parents know. I just cried for two whole hours.

— Deeper and Deeper In Trouble, River Heights

Dear Deeper and Deeper: Lots of people get together because someone let one person know the other person was interested. If that had happened, your bother would be thanking you. But, generally, it’s better to keep someone’s secret crush secret.

“I am so sorry. I didn’t know it’d get back to her” is all you can say now. Your mom or dad needs to intervene at this point as the anger and hurt have gotten serious, and they wouldn’t want you two to stop being friends.

Your parents may know what it’ll take to get you back to being friends. If your brother has a sense of humour, you might start wearing a mask around the house as a sign you’re keeping your big mouth shut now!

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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