Make manscaping fun for your hirsute hunk

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 04/10/2021 (1825 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I can’t stand my gorgeous boyfriend’s hairy back. This may sound weird, because I love his hairy chest and face, but I can’t stand the way he looks like an ape when he turns around. I know I can’t order him to get it waxed, and he can’t reach there to shave it. So I fibbed, and told him I find skimpy muscle shirts a big turn on, even at the beach.

He’s a great guy and I’ve always looked past it, but now we live together and I see his back all the time. Is there a safe, painless way to fix this? Am I wrong to even suggest such a thing?

— Puzzled, St. Boniface

Dear Puzzled: Beauty specialist Barb Nziggy of Diplomat Hair Salon says men often “don’t appreciate” the pain aspect of waxing and sugaring. “His partner should buy clippers and make a date night, every three weeks, and clean him up as part of it,” says Nziggy. Another tip: “A No. 2 setting on clippers with a guard can be used on the chest. It only takes out the grey hairs, leaving the nice, dark ones.”

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: Instead of telling Frustrated New Girlfriend to ditch the guitar-playing boyfriend who takes over entertaining at her dinners, you gave very good advice. I agree she should focus more on encouraging him to join a band or start a new one.

I can identify! Back in the 1970s, as a young married man, my wife never had a good word to say about my guitar playing. While I didn’t play a lot, nor entertain friends, I tried to play from time to time. I finally got dejected and sold my Gibson “Lucille” guitar and amp for low prices. (Replacement price is now over 10 times what I sold them for.) We eventually divorced!

Fast forward to 2009 when I put a band together to play a Battle of the Bands. I bought new equipment, played for three years in a row, and won the trophy in 2010. It’s such a thrill to be on stage and playing in a band! And one of the bands I put together in 2015 for Rock for Dimes Battle of the Bands also was a winning band!

— Wish I’d had the Wife’s Support! Manitoba

Dear Wish: It often takes years of practice to be a successful musician and the people you have in your life can help you make it.

The best mate for a musician is probably another musician. Tagging along and listening to your mate play the same sets each night can’t be much fun, unless you’re playing too. It’s good you bought new equipment and got into some bands for competitions. You finally got your chance to shine!

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: This is in response to the mother concerned about her daughter marrying a cheater — since she saw the video of her future son-in-law with another woman.

When I was young, I married a guy my mom hated (with good reason). Her constant criticism about him drove a deep wedge between us, and gave my husband fuel for encouraging me to avoid my mom.

This also meant it was hard for me to approach my mom when my marriage began failing.

It was only when my mom quit criticizing this guy that I was able to tell her my marriage problems. Wisely, my mom never said “I told you so,” and she offered unconditional love and support when I left my ex.

This mother, who saw the video and wrote you, has already made her point to her daughter. She needs to treat her daughter’s fiancé with as much respect and warmth as she can stomach — and ensure she keeps her relationship with her daughter close for when that marriage fails, and her daughter needs her. Most importantly, never say “I told you so!” to her.

— Love My Mom, Winnipeg

Dear Love My Mom: When your mother finally offered you her love, support and a soft place to fall, it enabled you to leave more easily. That’s the best we can do as parents, unless we have evidence of wrong-doing like cheating before the wedding happens.

Many parents have found it wise to take a pleasant “wait-and-see” approach to their child’s prospective new mate. Then there’s no additional family pressure to keep the couple together if the relationship starts coming apart before the wedding.

The parents are not losing a son- or daughter-in-law they already love; they have no big emotional investment, so won’t push for the marriage to happen.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

   Read full biography