Be thankful underhanded flight flirtation fizzled

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 14/06/2022 (1575 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I just met a Winnipeg man on an airplane when I was also flying home from my first holiday since the pandemic struck. We talked the whole way home, and he was openly flirty.

I was loving it! I felt like I’d met an attractive new friend — and a single one, so even better! He didn’t say anything about a girlfriend — not one word. Then we got off the plane and came in to get our baggage. All of a sudden, this woman came flying at him, arms wide, yelling “Surprise!” and jumped up for a kiss — which he enthusiastically returned.

My heart was in my shoes watching this scene. I caught his eye, and gave him a nasty look. He looked away, although I know he saw me. How was I supposed to take this? What a shock! He was the one flirting with me on the plane, and I innocently ended up responding. How am I supposed to feel now? I am so confused.

— Taken For a Ride? Westwood

Dear Taken: What happened to you was actually a piece of luck. If you hadn’t seen the passionate meet-and-greet at the airplane, you might have been taken in, and wasted some precious time with that snake.

Look in the mirror and have a talk with yourself. Start it like this: “My friend, you just met a real-time player in action. Be glad he isn’t your main man, and feel sorry for the woman he’s with.”

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My new girlfriend and I are already a tight-knit couple after four months — two women with many of the same interests, and a strong attraction. But, last night after we drank a lot of wine, my sweetie got into “confessional mode.” She told me she’d had a boyfriend when she was in high school, and she almost married him.

I have only ever loved women! Now I’m feeling insecure with my new love. What if a guy comes along and she decides she wants a pregnancy and a baby, the conventional way. I feel very sick in the pit of my stomach and I lie wake at night thinking of terrible scenarios. Please help me.

— Scared of a Future With Her, south Winnipeg

Dear Scared: You’re going to have to express all this to your girlfriend, and the sooner the better, as it’s making you sick. The good news? Chances are it will come out well for you. Many people come out of the closet having had one relationship or more with people of the opposite sex. They may have really wanted a same-sex relationship all along, but not have been able to tell their families and friends — until they got older and felt strong enough.

You are a free and happy choice, made after the difficult stages of repressing true feelings was over. That means you are probably not in danger — but you still need to ask.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: This is for “Unhappy Chosen One,” whose manager has decided they are the boss’s favourite in the office. A good manager needs to know that getting personal with employees is a bad idea. All work-related criticism should be kept courteous and professional, and all employees should be treated equally in this way.

“Chosen One’s” manager seems to be treating individuals differently, and treating some with outright disrespect. I wonder if they would feel comfortable explaining the situation to their overall boss, instead of just backing off or quitting.

If everyone else was treated in a professional manner, being the manager’s friend might be more tolerable, especially if it appeared to be at arm’s length.

— Knowing the Work Scene, Winnipeg

Dear Knowing: Let’s hope “Unhappy Chosen One” doesn’t feel she has to quit her job. Talking to the “big boss” would have to be done diplomatically, and it might be the only thing that works. Of course, that depends on how angry the manager is once he figures out who complained about him, and he probably will.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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