Get husband out of house — and yard — on Halloween

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This article was published 31/10/2015 (3991 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: Our neighbours go all out for Halloween and we think it’s disgusting. We are deeply spiritual people and it looks like the devil’s work to us. Last year we made our disapproval known, and I hate to tell you what this young couple said to us, but it was a vulgar expression that ended with the word “off.” This year we haven’t said anything about their decorations, but they decorated their entire yard in defiance of our beliefs.

My husband says, “Just forget it. They will burn in hell.” But last year he took an uncommon interest in watching all the kids in costumes by sitting out in our yard in a lawn chair in the dark. I think this is weird behaviour and don’t want it to happen again. Please advise me.

— Spiritual Lady, East Kildonan

Dear Spiritual: Insist on treating your husband to dinner out and take him to his favourite restaurant from 6 p.m. to 8:30 p.m. when the majority of the Halloween action takes place. He’s gotten fixated on Halloween and being angry about it, and needs to be pried lose. The best way is to turn off the house lights, get in the car and go out early. Avoid Halloween night completely.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: On Halloween, I want to go out trick-or-treating one last time, but my parents say I’m too old at 13. The thing is, my best girlfriend and I are short and no one would know how old we are, especially in a full face mask. I already snuck my costume over to her house where we’re having a sleepover. Her parents don’t know we’re going out when they leave the house to go to their party, which last until midnight. We are only going to the houses of people whose parents we know. I want to do it, but I feel guilty about sneaking. Should I tell my parents?

— Feeling Guilty, Winnipeg

Dear Guilty: Yes, you should tell your parents you just want to go out a little bit in the early evening to peoples’ houses you know — one last time. Tell them that if anyone guesses your age and tells you to forget trick-or-treating, you’ll come right home. Don’t sneak out! Imagine if you got caught doing this against your parents’ wishes or some creeps came after you and you were harmed. Parents need to know where their kids are these days, as a safety precaution. As an alternate activity, you should go to your girlfriend’s house in costume, greet kids together at her door and handout candy. You can eat the leftovers, then watch spooky movies and scare yourselves silly.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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