Watch how soon you say the “L” word

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 14/05/2016 (3796 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I met this guy online and played it cool for the first few weeks, and then let him into my life and warmed up. Now he isn’t so interested. Is love just a game with him ?

— Hurt Feelings, Osborne Village

Dear Hurt Feelings: Love? Whoops! Did you happen to mention the L-word just a few weeks in? Use of the premature L-word works like weed spray: you can instantly kill the weed and everything else around it. If his feelings were growing during the first few weeks, you were doing something right. When you turned around with the lovey-dovey stuff, he wasn’t ready. And I’m guessing neither were you.

If he said he was in love with you and wanted to get serious after a few weeks there’s a good chance you would have backed off, too. So cool it off and see if he recovers from his fear and comes back. If not, move along and learn by your timing mistake.

Dear Readers: This is an important message from me to you. The world has become very stressful in recent times, and sometimes we have people around us who are experiencing difficulties with mental health. You may not know exactly what’s going on, but you see a problem with someone in your sphere emerging , getting worse or perhaps someone is already spinning out of control. It could be a friend, your romantic partner, a child, neighbour or someone in the workplace. What do you do?

Tina Holland, Director of Education at Mood Disorders Association of Manitoba, is offering a two-day course on June 11 and 12 at 4 Fort St. composed of 12 hours of instruction. People will learn skills to help someone who is developing mental-health problems or is already experiencing them. The course does not train you to be a counsellor, therapist or mental-health professional, but it does train you to recognize signs and symptoms of common problems to do with depression, anxiety disorders, psychosis and substance abuse.

The course also trains people to deal with someone who is already experiencing a crisis with symptoms such as suicidal thoughts or psychosis. Call Mental Health First Aid (MHFA) at 204-780-4126 for more information. For registration email CharlotteS@mooddisordersmanitoba.ca. or call 204-295-5077, or 1-800-263-1460. It’s $100 for the course, with a manual, and nationally certified accreditation, on completion.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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