Man’s wandering eye has partner worried

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This article was published 21/04/2019 (2715 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I am a gay man, and before the big deep freeze this winter I met a man who was willing to hibernate with me. But now that spring has sprung, he’s starting to look around. He doesn’t even make a secret of it. His eyes go everywhere.

When he was younger, he thought of himself as God’s gift to the male sex, but I thought he’d calmed down. As the days grow warmer, I am very much afraid I’m going to lose this man who was my great romance over the past five months. I have this sinking feeling that he’s going back to his promiscuous ways. Please help. I’m just sick over it.

— Stomach Troubles, Osborne Village

Dear Troubles: Trust your gut. Unfortunately, it’s usually right. Your man doesn’t care enough to hide the fact he’s eyeing up other people. No doubt he has many hours of the day when he could be flirting with someone in your absence.

Don’t let him wear away your self-confidence until there’s nothing left. Give him a jolt right now by telling him you don’t want to be with someone who’s checking out other men all the time. If he really loves you, he’ll smarten up.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m a loving and caring mom, and both my kids are married to people I don’t like! I know that sounds harsh, but how on earth did they both end up with these lazy, entitled people?

My daughter married a guy who works a seasonal job six months of the year, and goes on EI for the other half. He doesn’t do anything on the side for extra income. He’d rather the family change their lifestyle for six months than go out to work for that period. My daughter works 12 months a year, and they have three kids.

My son is married to a woman who acts like he is super inconvenient, a major pain in her precious behind. She comes from a very wealthy family and her dad was the type who felt she could do no wrong — no wonder she is rude and entitled. She works at a professional job, but around my son, she’s so condescending I just want to smack her.

I have been seeing both families less and less. My kids have wondered where I’ve been. Should I tell them how I feel about their poor marriage choices, or just keep my mouth shut? I’ve kept mostly buttoned up on their choices, but maybe I should have tried to intervene earlier. Am I wrong?

— Lips Still Sealed, Winnipeg

Dear Lips: Yes, you should have spoken up earlier, but now that you’ve played along you may want to continue to keep your lips buttoned if you want to see your dear grandchildren. No one will appreciate your belated criticism and advice. It’s too late, at least for now. If the marriages fail and your kids are spitting venom, then you can finally join in. For now, stay nice, secure in the knowledge that one out of two marriages fail.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m a woman in my mid-30s, no kids, and I’m burnt out from online dating. The internet was supposed to make things easier for people, but it feels like the opposite. I don’t have hobbies or anything like that, so the only people I really see anymore are my co-workers (and they aren’t my cup of tea either). I’m also a bit shy and the bar scene isn’t my thing. Any suggestions?

— Losing Faith, West Kildonan

Dear Losing Faith: You’d be a good candidate for meetup.com, where you can find groups of like-minded people interested in most any activity you can think of.

Since you’re single and without kids, I’d advise joining as many groups as you can handle and devote this spring and summer to exploring new activities and meeting all kinds of new friends. People in these groups may be attached to a lot of other singles and you can form a bit of a network this way.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave. Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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